That is horrible. I feel for you and your family. My words will do nothing for you, but I am wishing you well. Give your family an extra hug the next time you can.
Sorry to hear of your loss of the little one. When King David's son died he said he cannot come back to me but I can go to Him.
He is in the FATHER'S house and you can spend eternity with him.
Praying for the comfort of the LORD for you and your wife.
It sucks, but in time you'll get on with life even though right now it doesn't feel that way. And your eyes, if like mine will always be tearing up at the slightest provocation.
I've been there with my granddaughter, only she was born perfectly healthy. 372 days later we were holding her just as you did, while basically in shock, even though we had been going through a roller coaster ride of emotion for 6 weeks.
The reason? In my case I think the reason was my daughter. She's now a registered nurse working in the PICU in the very same hospital where Emily went home to be with the Lord. She even works the same NICU sometimes when they are short handed. I don't have a clue how she does it except it was her calling. Yes, there's a reason and we may never know it in this life. I'm fortunate in that I got to find out, most of us don't.