Alcohol cravings and getting it under control.

BillM

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I couldn't disagree more. Alcoholics don't have the capacity to "moderate" drinking, not in the long term at least.

Some of the financial logic y'all are applying makes sense, but to an alcoholic/drug addict in the middle of a craving, it goes out the window. A guy needs a couple months clean and sober for the fog to lift and logic to have any relevance in his mind.
True alcoholics can't be helped. Though sometimes they can help themselves. Not everyone who drinks a lot is an alcoholic. Though alcoholic is probably the way to bet. If he's sensible enough to realize he needs to stop drinking, he may not be a true alcoholic, and he may be able to reduce his drinking eventually to nothing. Only way to find out is to try. And cold-turkey will leave him sick and miserable for quite a while. He's already mentioned that. Most folks aren't able to do it long enough for it to work. I watched my parents trying to quit smoking and drinking. Dad never quite managed it, but did back off quite a ways on the alcohol. Mom quit drinking & smoking, but not until after she quit hanging around my dad. Which happened when I was 4, and it was decades before she quit the smoking and drinking.

I managed not to start drinking alcohol, and to quit smoking while I was still quite young. Caffeine and sugar are my drugs of choice these days, and I'm way past not young anymore, though maybe not yet old. The guy I mentioned didn't want to stop drinking, or even back down a bit. I've no idea how long he lasted after he got thrown out of the USAF, but I suspect it wasn't very long. If you get drunk on your first drink, like my friend, probably nothing is going to help. If you can back it down you can reduce the dependence. Otherwise I'd weight over 600lbs. I've managed not to hit 300 yet, but I'm a lot closer than I'd like to be.

Bill
 

TedKennedy

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True alcoholics can't be helped. Though sometimes they can help themselves. Not everyone who drinks a lot is an alcoholic. Though alcoholic is probably the way to bet. If he's sensible enough to realize he needs to stop drinking, he may not be a true alcoholic, and he may be able to reduce his drinking eventually to nothing.

You have absolutely no idea what you're talking about.
 

swampratt

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When I started dating my now wife, we agreed tobacco couldnt be a thing around the kids. I didn't want to normalize it for them in an effort to hopefully keep them from ever using it themselves

I do not smoke and the wife quit smoking when she had kids.
We do not drink coffee.
We have never bought a new car.
We never made payments on a car.
Credit card was all paid off at the end of the month. No interest paid that way.

Guess what both of our full grown boys do.

You guessed it they both smoke.
They both thought a new car was a good idea. Bit them in the rear.
They both drink coffee.
They both have credit card debt.

Does not matter sometimes what parents do each person has a choice of how they want to go through life.

Our parents smoked and drank coffee and we do not.
My parents were always paying on a house or car and sometimes not enough left for electric.

Not me Not my wife either.

We all have choices and it is up to us to make the right ones.
 

TedKennedy

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I do not smoke and the wife quit smoking when she had kids.
We do not drink coffee.
We have never bought a new car.
We never made payments on a car.
Credit card was all paid off at the end of the month. No interest paid that way.

Guess what both of our full grown boys do.

You guessed it they both smoke.
They both thought a new car was a good idea. Bit them in the rear.
They both drink coffee.
They both have credit card debt.

Does not matter sometimes what parents do each person has a choice of how they want to go through life.

Our parents smoked and drank coffee and we do not.
My parents were always paying on a house or car and sometimes not enough left for electric.

Not me Not my wife either.

We all have choices and it is up to us to make the right ones.

Yep. My wife and kids have never seen me drink. (because I stopped before I met my wife)

Church on Sundays, drove the bus for quite a few years. Church on Wednesdays often.

Safe, clean house, no violence, drugs, drinking, BS of any kind.

One son went to the USMC, stayed 5 years. Good dude.

The other I buried four and a half years ago. Brilliant kid, movie star good looks, then got into drugs. (he was the older of the two)

Some retards will tell me what a great job we must have done in order to get Marine son. So perhaps we failed the first one? (they're three years apart)

It's bull feces - we provided the best home we could, they chose what they wanted. I hate it worse than anything, but that's how it is.
 

wawazat

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I do not smoke and the wife quit smoking when she had kids.
We do not drink coffee.
We have never bought a new car.
We never made payments on a car.
Credit card was all paid off at the end of the month. No interest paid that way.

Guess what both of our full grown boys do.

You guessed it they both smoke.
They both thought a new car was a good idea. Bit them in the rear.
They both drink coffee.
They both have credit card debt.

Does not matter sometimes what parents do each person has a choice of how they want to go through life.

Our parents smoked and drank coffee and we do not.
My parents were always paying on a house or car and sometimes not enough left for electric.

Not me Not my wife either.

We all have choices and it is up to us to make the right ones.
Oh yeah, we get that completely. My parents had habits I have never formed as well. If they do decide to start smoking, my conscience will be clear that it was not due to me smoking though.
 

icarus_85

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Hey there Holechit. Man...what you describe is something that's right there on a knife's edge. Here's the advice, and take it from someone who's been right where you are. You either drink... or you don't. That's what I have come to know and believe. I tried every which way to be "just" a social drinker, or just have a few to get a buzz because after all, it's Friday/Saturday night and it's time to relax and have some fun. But that funny thing about alcohol, is it doesn't care what YOU want. It seeps into your life and then one day you realize that everything you do revolves around that moment you get to sit in your easy chair and drink. For me, the buzzes didn't come easy or fast enough and before I knew what had happened while sitting there watching 3 to 4 hours of TV, I had blown through a half handle of Tito's. Left just enough for Saturday night. I'm a happy drunk. Man...I like to drink because it makes me happy, happy, happy. I laugh at anything, I look at the world through caring eyes when I'm drinking. I'm more agreeable, charitable, and carefree when I've had way too much to drink. Why would I want to give up alcohol? Life's great! But you can't be in that state for 16 hours a day and live very long. You do that long enough and you start having other physical issues that alcohol contributes to. Liver, heart, blood pressure, circulatory, diabetes, overweight, you name it.... it will eventually kill you. My bottom came when I started feeling like I couldn't get out of bed and my nervous system was on fire for the whole day. I felt like **** all day long. Then, knowing how I was going to feel tomorrow, I'd drink anyway. THAT's when I knew I needed help with this. Long story short, I'm sober and I don't drink anymore..... AND it took a long time getting there. Just as it did getting into that situation in the first place. I had to figure out what made me laugh and all the other stuff I felt when I was drinking. That took some time too. And discipline. Lots of it. Funny thing is, I didn't start drinking, heavy drinking until I was 50 years old. My old man was an alcoholic and he was just like me. A happy drunk. But it got him in a bad way. He died when he was 49 years old from a heart attack that I am sure was exacerbated by alcohol abuse and 2 pack per day habit. He was drinking a fifth of Vodka every day for the last few years of his life. When I turned 50 I thought well hell, I've made it further than my old man did, I can have a drink or two. Well, you know the story.

So as others have stated here, more succinctly than I, I don't think you are ready to really quit drinking. There is no drinking "just a little" when you have a problem relationship with alcohol. So with that, I would tell you to be kind to yourself as you move forward trying to figure out what exactly it is you want to do. Drink or not to drink. Some people can do it. They have their 2 cocktails made with 1 or 2 ounce pours and call it good. Those of us with a problem can never call it good. So don't beat yourself up when you drink more than you really wanted to, but at the same time keep trying to answer your own dilemma. If you get to the point that you really want to do something about it there are people, good people, that can help you along your journey. And it will be a journey for the rest of your life. And it can be good. Really good.

Good luck. Get outside, breathe some cold air, and feel the sun on your face. You'll start to figure some things out.
 

El Pablo

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True alcoholics can't be helped. Though sometimes they can help themselves. Not everyone who drinks a lot is an alcoholic. Though alcoholic is probably the way to bet. If he's sensible enough to realize he needs to stop drinking, he may not be a true alcoholic, and he may be able to reduce his drinking eventually to nothing…
What? Alcoholics can certainly be helped. If they recognize they have a problem. Same thing is true about all addiction.
 

HoLeChit

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Been a crazy few days, haven’t had a chance to go through all this until now.

I really appreciate everything, all the advice and offers to help. I’m taking that to heart and taking in the advice, I may hit some of you up if necessary.

I feel that I may have overstated my problem with alcohol. Or perhaps I’m numb to how bad it has gotten? Either way I’m looking into it all, and quitting forever isn’t outside the question. I do intend on reaching out to a substance abuse counselor or whoever just to get a good professional opinion about everything.
 
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montesa

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If you’re over 40, it doesn’t take much to throw you off your game. It can be a slow drain even if you aren’t going hard all the time. If you get a feeling of satisfaction from it, it’s easier to chase that than tackle the things that are important.
 
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