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The Water Cooler
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Who knows Jack Schitt?
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<blockquote data-quote="mightymouse" data-source="post: 3216276" data-attributes="member: 15253"><p>Some of you will have seen this before, but for those who have not, here is the genealogy of Mr. Jack Schitt.</p><p></p><p>Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate. Awe married Miss O. Needeep, and Jack was their only child.</p><p></p><p>Jack Schitt married the former Miss Noe Fricken, thereafter known as Noe Fricken-Schitt. They had six children, Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deap and Dip Schitt. Jack and Noe Fricken-Schitt divorced after 31 years together.</p><p></p><p>Noe Fricken-Schitt later married Ted Sherlock. Proud of her name, she preferred to be called Noe Fricken-Schitt Sherlock. </p><p></p><p>Jack's youngest daughter, Deap Schitt, married her first cousin, Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. Their whereabouts are unknown.</p><p></p><p>Dip Schitt and his wife Loda Schitt have one son, a rather nervous youth named Chick N. Schitt.</p><p></p><p>Jack's daughters, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, who were inseparable throughout their childhood, grew up to marry the Happenz brothers in a dual ceremony. The local newspaper announced the nuptials under the headline of, "Schitt-Happenz".</p><p></p><p>The Schitt-Happenz children are Dawg, Bryd, and Hoarse.</p><p></p><p>Bull Schitt, oldest son of Jack Schitt, married an Italian gal, Pisa Schitt.</p><p></p><p>Holie Schitt entered a convent and became a legend. Even today, people frequently invoke the name of Holie Schitt when good things happen.</p><p></p><p>And that is the story of Jack Schitt.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="mightymouse, post: 3216276, member: 15253"] Some of you will have seen this before, but for those who have not, here is the genealogy of Mr. Jack Schitt. Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate. Awe married Miss O. Needeep, and Jack was their only child. Jack Schitt married the former Miss Noe Fricken, thereafter known as Noe Fricken-Schitt. They had six children, Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deap and Dip Schitt. Jack and Noe Fricken-Schitt divorced after 31 years together. Noe Fricken-Schitt later married Ted Sherlock. Proud of her name, she preferred to be called Noe Fricken-Schitt Sherlock. Jack's youngest daughter, Deap Schitt, married her first cousin, Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. Their whereabouts are unknown. Dip Schitt and his wife Loda Schitt have one son, a rather nervous youth named Chick N. Schitt. Jack's daughters, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, who were inseparable throughout their childhood, grew up to marry the Happenz brothers in a dual ceremony. The local newspaper announced the nuptials under the headline of, "Schitt-Happenz". The Schitt-Happenz children are Dawg, Bryd, and Hoarse. Bull Schitt, oldest son of Jack Schitt, married an Italian gal, Pisa Schitt. Holie Schitt entered a convent and became a legend. Even today, people frequently invoke the name of Holie Schitt when good things happen. And that is the story of Jack Schitt. [/QUOTE]
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