Phrases you heard through the years........

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Cohiba

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Yes, I know this is a "gun" website. Just remember, this is the general disucssion section...so don't state; "There goes that ding dang, Cohiba and his silly little threads!!!!!

There have been phrases I have heard as a kid and it seems they have either died out with the times, or aren't as common, or maybe I'm just "city-slicker" in my older age.

List phrases and maybe when or where you heard them in your life.

DAM^ -IT- TO- H#LL!!!!: This one my grandad used all the freakin' time something went wrong. When he busted his knuckles workin' on the tractor, to getting kicked in his knee by a mule, to having a bunch of calves break down a fence and scatter like the wind.

THAT THING'LL BITE YOUR HEAD OFF!!! My great uncle Otis would yell this out when we were around snakes, wasps, spiders,skunks, opossums.....
I guess that was his way of trying to scare a kid into leaving something alone??

That thing's neater than sliced bread-or-That thing's neater than pockets.
Mainly, older relatives. Any time a cousin got a new car, gun, coat...something I guess to compliment....that phrase came up.

Colder than a well digger's azz: All the time...when its cold that is.

Slicker than snot on glass: My cousin use to say this about icey roads or really muddy roads or trails. We use to ride dirtbikes and when we took a break, if it was real muddy or wet clay, he'd say this.


Like white on rice: My grandad used this when he torqued down a nut on a bolt, or used lock-tite. He meant it wasn't going to come loose or come off.

Tighter than a tick on a dog: Old grandad used this to explain that whatever the situation was in front of us...it wasn't going to be fun or easy.

Useless as t!ts on a boar hog: Totally worthless.

Happier than a coon dog during mating season: Happy,happy, joy, joy.

Hotter than a two dollar pistol: A bunch of my relatives used this phrase in different ways. Describe a stolen item or a goodlooking woman.

Hotter than a June bride on a feather bed: I haven't heard this one in years...I came home from college with a girlfriend, and I introduced her to my family. She was a VERY attractive blonde!! Later that night, I asked my grandad what he thought about my college cutie. He liked to LOOK, yes LOOK at the women!! He sit there for a few seconds, looked at the ceiling, put a grin on his face and stated those words.

A possum just ran across my grave: My mom said this when she got chilled or cold and shrugged her shoulders.

Bless your heart: Any time someone had a hardship or had an injury, my mom said this to them.


There's a million more, but I'll stop and let you write some. I may have heard of them or there might be some new ones....who knows.


Cohiba
 

steelhorse

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Busier than a one-legged man in a azz kickin' contest.

Hornier than a 3 peckered billy-goat.

I'll stomp a mud-hole in your azz and walk it dry.

Slicker than owl **** on a pump handle.

Sweatin' like a w**re in church.

That dog'll hunt.

Colder than a witch's titty in a brass bra.

Well, **** the bed.
 

Fyrtwuck

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Busier than a cat with diarrhea trying to cover holes.

Busier than a one legged man in a butt kickin contest.

It's tough to drain the swap when you're up to your butt in alligators.

Don't let your alligator mouth overload your hummingbird butt.
 

Cohiba

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Of course...Don't squat with your spurs on.

My wife uses these phrases on me....when I hear the first one...she found out I broke something, bought something, or tried to hide something from her. Again, when I hear this....I had better go to the cigar store or gun range!!

HOLY MOTHER OF GOD!!!!!

My wife heard Loretta Lynn sing the song..You Ain't Woman Enough( To Take My Man).

When she heard about half of that song she made up a new phrase and substitued her phrase...so now if and when she hears that song she sings...You Ain't STUPID Enough To Take My Man...That's a slam one me!!!!!

My wife really likes to tease me..when I bring work from home or I'm thinking about the next days work.
She'll ask me what I'm so in thought about, I'll reply that I have a lot on my mind.
My wife will say...Your brain isn't big enough to have a lot on your mind.....?????

Just kiddin' around!!!

Cohiba
 

HMFIC

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- So stupid, he could F up a bowling ball with a rubber mallet.
- Hotter than a three balled tomcat.
- Hotter than a two p3ckered billygoat.
- Tired as a one legged man in an a$$ kicking contest.
- Jumpier than a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.
- Driving like a dog pi$$ing. (This one is for those people who constantly speed up and slow down)
- So stupid he could be in a rubber room with two anvils, lose one and break the other.
- So stupid he probably can't even pi$$ straight.
- Don't know his butt from a hole in the ground.
- So nasty it would make a possum gag.
- So ugly it looks like her head caught fire and was put out with a wet chain.

I got a million of 'em...
 

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