What to do about a friend that won't call me back

[sumoj275]

Me and a friend, close friend whom I had known for 15 years plus, passed away while we weren’t talking to each other due to me telling him how I really felt about his move-in girlfriend who was using him. After several months of trying to get ahold of him, and a visit to his house which was up for sale I did a search of the obits based on a feeling. There it was, he had passed away. Talk about sick stomach and a kick to the balls. I called his dad at his shop and he told me they had try to get ahold of me but didn’t have my number but I feel they knew we had the separation due to the falling out. Needless to say, I still miss my friend, he was actually like ab older brother that I didn’t have. Don’t give it too much time.

BTW, I found out later through a guy that knew my buddy that as soon as he had passed she was caught trying to forge documents, bank accounts, title of his truck and classic cars

 

[Shoot Summ]

last 7 weeks. About a dozen text messages and 30 phone calls. He won't answer or call me back or even message me back.

I need to make that larger for the impact it has. It's already been said, but that is excessive(almost stalker-ish), he is absolutely sending you a message. You should have gotten the message on about 3 messages and 3 calls.

Reading the rest of this, you pushed him into something he didn't want to do, you had many hints along the way with the lack of progress. Then you show up to retrieve it and he isn't there, that is not just a hint, that is a loud message.

Let this cool off, might take some time, I wouldn't make this worse by showing up somewhere and backing him into a corner, he has already purposely avoided you. He doesn't want anything to do with you right now.

If you do get the opportunity to set it right, remember that you want this relationship back. Apologize, and accept ALL of the blame for what ever it was that unraveled your friendship. Don't start trying to unpack what happened, and start pushing blame on him.

 

[MR.T.]

I don't think it's stalker-ish. It's about 1 phone call attempt every other day. And I looked back and it was only 10 messages.
I don't blame him for anything and won't. And I don't even plan to bring up any topic on the pickup when/if I do get him to talk. I've even asked him how is car was coming along. Which is something he was always excited to talk about what he has been doing on it.

I'm probably going to give him some time to think things out. And probably try to get in touch with him again maybe around Thanksgiving or something.

 

[Shoot Summ]

I don't think it's stalker-ish. It's about 1 phone call attempt every other day. And I looked back and it was only 10 messages.
I don't blame him for anything and won't. And I don't even plan to bring up any topic on the pickup when/if I do get him to talk. I've even asked him how is car was coming along. Which is something he was always excited to talk about what he has been doing on it.

I'm probably going to give him some time to think things out. And probably try to get in touch with him again maybe around Thanksgiving or something.

If I was ghosting someone, and they called me every other day for seven weeks(30 calls in 49 days is more than that) and sent 10 messages, I would be concerned....

When my Son was ghosting a crazy chick, that was pretty much the pattern, he finally blocked her number, which honestly might be what is going on with you, he may have blocked you after the first dozen or so calls.

Glad you are going to take a step back, I think that is the right thing to do.

 

[C_Hallbert]

Have a lady friend call until his wife answere. Then have her leave a message to tell him their night together was ‘simply marvelous’.

 

[elwoodtrix]

cable guy