You, my friend, and I walked the same road. My kids, though none of them were planned, did in fact save my life.
The military, and its dicipline saved mine.
Grandkids are better...you can fill them full of sugar, teach 'em questionable actions (like how to play poker), let 'em stay up all night...then send 'em home.
Kids are amazing. They're also you're most powerful tool to use in changing the world, since you didn't become President.
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Add to that list buying them expensive toys that you couldn't afford to buy their parents, Noisey toys that you wouldn't tolerate, same with messy toys,
I have 2 kids, and love them, but most times i can't stand others kids. my 9 yr old son is a middle line backer, and a damn good one, and my daughter is about to start school. with others kids, i think its a discipline issue. my kids are well behaved, have been since about 3 yrs old or so.
As a career rock musician always traveling and touring, over half of my life, I admittedly have not been much more than a sperm donor to my 3 kids, all of which I have had with 3 different mothers. And all who thankfully have been raised by some very good women as mothers and have had good men in their mothers lives who have stepped up and filled in as their fathers and they all have turned out very well.
Now that they are teenagers we are working on getting close, when I can find the time to be with them even though we all live in seperate states. I found that all of the material things that I showered them with thinking it would compensate for my absence, did not. I also always payed way above the court ordered support,but,I found that money does not buy a kids happiness or love either. Kids need you to be there in person all the time,not just send them money and have long phone calls,and fly them to see you on the weekends that you have free.
Like JB stated, I too was always a selfish person. And like Gillman I led a pretty wild and crazy life until I met my current wife 7 years ago. She has helped straighten me out,clean me up, and helped me grow up. Ironically I adopted my 2 stepchildren and have become a fairly good close parent to them as their father passed away when they were young and they never really had a father.
I cant go back and change anything in my life but if I could I probably would have tried harder to have been there for my own kids more than I was.
I understand both sides- I can see how people can not or do not want to be parents,and I can see why people who are parents love being parents.
Now that they are teenagers we are working on getting close, when I can find the time to be with them even though we all live in seperate states. I found that all of the material things that I showered them with thinking it would compensate for my absence, did not. I also always payed way above the court ordered support,but,I found that money does not buy a kids happiness or love either. Kids need you to be there in person all the time,not just send them money and have long phone calls,and fly them to see you on the weekends that you have free.
Like JB stated, I too was always a selfish person. And like Gillman I led a pretty wild and crazy life until I met my current wife 7 years ago. She has helped straighten me out,clean me up, and helped me grow up. Ironically I adopted my 2 stepchildren and have become a fairly good close parent to them as their father passed away when they were young and they never really had a father.
I cant go back and change anything in my life but if I could I probably would have tried harder to have been there for my own kids more than I was.
I understand both sides- I can see how people can not or do not want to be parents,and I can see why people who are parents love being parents.
