Idiot sighting.....

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SdoubleA

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The new sign at Wal-Mart
fellowshipofminds.files.wordpress.com_2011_08_walmart_sign.jpg_68253b9395f5eb5669d88ca47264d46b.jpg

Our society is doomed.


IDIOT SIGHTING:
I handed the teller @ my bank a withdrawal slip for $400.00
I said "May I have large bills, please".
She looked at me and said "I'm sorry sir, all the bills are the same size."
When I got up off the floor, I explained it to her.

IDIOT SIGHTING
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'it's open!' His reply: 'I know, I already got that side.'

IDIOT SIGHTINGWe had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.
He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4.
He said, 'NO, it's not.' Four is larger than two.'
We haven't used Sears repair since.

IDIOT SIGHTING
My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter.
She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back. She sighed and went to get the manager, who asked me to repeat my request.
I did so, and he handed me back the quarter and said 'We're sorry but we could not do that kind of thing.' The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change. Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.

IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce. From Kansas City

IDIOT SIGHTING
I was at the airport checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?' He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'
Happened in Birmingham , Ala.

IDIOT SIGHTING
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged co-worker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'
She was a probation officer in Wichita , KS

IDIOT SIGHTING
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear co-worker who was leaving the company due to 'downsizing,' our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We should do this more often.'
Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.
This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.
For all of us who are seniors...
The reason why baby diapers have brand names such as Luvs and Huggies, while undergarments for old people are called Depends:
When babies poop in their diapers, people are still gonna Luv'em and Hug'em.
When old people poop in their diapers, the reaction Depends on who's in the will!


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mightymouse

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A man walks into an auto parts store and asks, "Do you sell toilet seats?" When told, "No", he surveys three walls lined with fan belts, glances down at a rack of car batteries at his elbow, and then asks, "Isn't this a plumbing store?"

Another man walks into a bicycle shop, strolls past 60-some odd bicycles on the display floor, walks up to a display cabinet full of bicycle accessories, and loudly says, "I want my windows tinted and a television installed."

"Well", says I, "I didn't know bicycles had windows and we sure don't install televisions on them."

"I don't want a TV for my bicycle!", he says rather haughtily, eyeing the row of bicycle racing trophies behind the counter. "I want it for my SUV!", and points, rather impatiently, to an Expedition on over-size chrome rims and low-profile tires in the parking lot.

"Sir, this is a bicycle shop! The car place is next door!" Without a word, he turns and leaves, certainly no wiser than when he came in.
 

O4L

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I was Lowe's the other day getting some pricing for materials and someone calls and asks the guy working at the counter what color their almond siding was!
 

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