What would you do?

[Lurker66]

We took my niece and her boyfreind to dinner tonight. She graduates this year. We have been giving each niece or nephew $400 for graduation. This particular niece has decided to get married right after graduation. Tonight she asked for an advance on her present to help with wedding.

My wife says to give it to her and forget about it, I'm kinda hesitant for the usual guy reasons. Age, maturity, they ain't been together long. Don't think he even works. Neither going to college. He ain't going in military. They just decided to get married like a month ago. She saysshe aain't prenant. And the Little ships didn't even offer to pick up tip.

Anyway wife says give it to her, I say wait until graduation. What would you do?

 

[piston10]

Wait. The wedding will probably not happen, that way the little terd does not get any.

 

[Oklahomabassin]

Tell her you will give half now and half on there first anniversary.

 

[kennedy]

wait til they get divorced, then give it to her. it doesn't sound like you'll have to wait long

 

[BadgeBunny]

Depends ... without knowing anymore than what you've told us here, I'm inclined to agree with your darling bride ...

ETA: Sounds like "Mr. Right" will come and go. She will be your niece forever.

 

[tyromeo55]

I say follow you gut.

If it were me..... Its a gift not an obligation. I'd wan to see her walk b4 I gave her a thing. If she is old enough to get married she is old enough to pay for it without hitting up the family

 

[JD8]

If $400 makes or breaks someone for a wedding in this case, they should hold off till they are more stable IMO.

 

[Okie4570]

You've been giving it them unconditionally before, I don't see what's different about this one, other than it's earlier on the calendar.

 

[Lurker66]

Oh its getting better now. Sis n law texts my wife and tells her not to give them any money. This is gonna turn into drama. My wife hates MY sis n law.

I'm screwed now.

 

[mtnboomer]

I doubt the money "is for the wedding," likely he has bills to pay and he asked her to get the money. That said, give HER the money and watch what she does with it. If she hands it straight to him - it's for him. If she puts it in her pocket/purse - it's for her. Either way, inform the couple that is all there is. She's an adult - immature, probably - but an adult nevertheless and needs to find out how cruel the real world can be. Hopefully, it will work out - but.............