I just got a call......

[Dukester]

My wife just called me to tell me that my 11 year old son just got three days of in school suspension for fighting. Since I'm working in Wyoming right now I told her to go see what happened and who started it. I have ingrained in my kids' heads that no one has the right to put their hands on them and if someone does to respond in kind, but they better not ever start it.

It turns out that my boy did not start it and at my instruction, my wife informed the assistant principal that he would not be punished at home for fighting because he was defending himself exactly as I told him to. The assistant principal said that she would have told her kids the same but the suspension still stands because fighting back is against the rules. I guess schools today don't think people should stand up for themselves. Am I the only one who thinks its normal for boys to fight at that age? I fought quite a bit when I was a kid but then most of us did then. These days I think they're trying to make young boys act more like young girls because its PC.

Anyhow, the boy is pretty broken up about it, especially since it sounds like the other kid got the better of him. I plan on calling him after work tonight to tell him that he did right and win or lose I'm still proud of him for not taking sh$t from the other kid.

 

[cjjtulsa]

It sucks, but is the rules. I've instructed both of mine the same as you, and had one teacher tell me she did the same for hers. I also told them never to start it, and also that, like in football, it's usually the one who retaliates that gets caught. Even if they are defending themselves, the school has to enact some kind of punishment to try and deter any physical altercation. I understand it, and will tolerate it if my boys have to defend themselves.

And kudos to your kid; he has to stand up for himself, or else increasingly become a target.

 

[Old Fart]

All part of the grand scheme to turn us into mindless servants.




He should have the opportunity to do his class work from home so he doesn't get behind.

 

[aviator41]

Teaching the same things to my son.

Sounds like he did the right thing and defended himself. the suspension is uncalled for. Boys fight. That's what they do. It's one thing to escalate a confrontation to that point, it's another to respond in kind. He needs to know that he did nothing wrong and you stand by him, regardless of how spineless the school is.

 

[Dukester]

All part of the grand scheme to turn us into mindless servants.




He should have the opportunity to do his class work from home so he doesn't get behind.

He does get to do his work, otherwise I'd have quite a different reaction. I guess the lesson to be learned from the suspension is to choose your battles and that there are always consequences, fair or not.

 

[Cohiba]

Zero tolerance. .. doesn't matter who's right or wrong...can't use common sense. ...zero tolerance.

 

[subprep]

Ive taught my daughters the exact same thing, schools have been training kids to be victims for quite some time now. I don't put up with it and would gladly publicly shame the school district for encouraging kids to be victims. I have a zero tolerance policy when someone puts any part of their body on any part of your body it is game on.

 

[ez bake]

My son got the same for a fight and the principal told me that they had video of what happened and the other kid hit my son in the back of the head and my son started to walk away... and then changed his mind. My boy is a 13 year old middle child, with ADD and very regressed/introverted, but he's also 5'9" and can almost grab the rim on a 10ft basketball goal and he's one of the hardest hitters on the football team - so he had no issue defending himself.

The Principal said my boy did exactly what he (the Principal) taught his kids and he commended him for (almost) walking away. But he kept saying "it's policy, we've gotta suspend him" which I find to be an extremely crappy stance to take, but I appreciate his position with crappy kids/parents suing, etc.

We're trying to regulate common sense out of places like businesses, schools, the government, the church, etc. You can't have a policy for everything that could possibly happen so there needs to be some leeway for judgment on the part of the person in-charge (IMO).

You need to have your wife talk to the school about him doing his work - Old Fart is correct in that your son should be able to do the work while he's missing class so he doesn't fall behind.


Funny story - like a lot of guy fights, this one resulted in my son and the kids he fought being close friends. Count your blessings, if they had been girls... holy crap you'd be in for like 10 years of horror.

 

[subprep]

Count your blessings, if they had been girls... holy crap you'd be in for like 10 years of horror.

HAHA you got that right, girls never forget.

 

[Dukester]

My son got the same for a fight and the principal told me that they had video of what happened and the other kid hit my son in the back of the head and my son started to walk away... and then changed his mind. My boy is a 13 year old middle child, with ADD and very regressed/introverted, but he's also 5'9" and can almost grab the rim on a 10ft basketball goal and he's one of the hardest hitters on the football team - so he had no issue defending himself.

The Principal said my boy did exactly what he (the Principal) taught his kids and he commended him for (almost) walking away. But he kept saying "it's policy, we've gotta suspend him" which I find to be an extremely crappy stance to take, but I appreciate his position with crappy kids/parents suing, etc.

We're trying to regulate common sense out of places like businesses, schools, the government, the church, etc. You can't have a policy for everything that could possibly happen so there needs to be some leeway for judgment on the part of the person in-charge (IMO).

You need to have your wife talk to the school about him doing his work - Old Fart is correct in that your son should be able to do the work while he's missing class so he doesn't fall behind.


Funny story - like a lot of guy fights, this one resulted in my son and the kids he fought being close friends. Count your blessings, if they had been girls... holy crap you'd be in for like 10 years of horror.

Dude, I have two younger daughters as well. The six year old is the meanest one of the bunch! Heck, Im already going gray and I'm only 40.