Phrases you heard through the years........

[csmith441]

Shes had more meat ran through her than Homeland!

Been here since Moby Dick was a Minnow!

It sparkles like a dime in a goats a$$!

Almost forgot my mom's favorite:

Whiskey for my men, beer for my horses, and a ****** for my alligator!

 

[Calamity Jake]

For the dumb:

His light's on but no body's home.

I don't think he has both ores in the water.

For the ones that just can't seem to get it done:

If you can't run with the big dogs, then stay on the porch

 

[Glock 'em down]

Some that I use damn near daily...

It's darker than the inside of an ape's ass! (When walking into a dark room)

He's as goofy as a rat in a tin shithouse.

It's colder than a mother-in-law's kiss.

It's hotter than the south side of hell.

Dumber than a sack of monkey nuts.

I'm as horny as a 30 point buck.

I'm as broke as the Ten Commandments.

 

[steelhorse]

I'm so poor that I can't pay attention.

If it cost a dollar to poop, I'd have to puke.

 

[Wing_Master01]

You can wish in one hand and **** in the other and see which one fills up first.
A little head never hurt any one.
Thank you grandpa and uncle gary...

 

[870WingBlaster]

mighty fine screen name you have there