Old Guys Rule- Poll

[dennishoddy]

DEFINING OLD:
1. Grampaw (Or Grammaw)
2. Over 45 (ish)
3. When your old tired-azz bones makes "rice crispy" sounds -"snap, crackle, pop" when you first get up
4. When you have to get up to go pee multiple times a night...
5. When you have trouble seeing the front sight; much less focusing on it
6. When you ask for a small coke at Mickey D's and the whipper-snapper punk behind the counter gives you a really small cup and only charges you 15 freaking cents

You need to spend a day with me pheasant hunting. 3-5 miles of walking behind a bird dog, with a 7lb shotgun, a 4lb box of ammo, heavy boots, layers of clothing.
2,3,5 goes away.
The punk at 6 knows from my look to ask what size.

Btw, I turned 60 this year, and don't have a gut.

 

[druryj]

YOU'RE GETTING OLDER WHEN...

- When your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.

- When your doctor doesn't give you x-rays anymore but just holds you up to the light.

- When a sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door nearest you.

- When your wife says, "Let's go upstairs and make love" and you answer, "Honey, I can't do both!"

- Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

- When you don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.

- You know you're getting old when your semi-annual erection becomes an annual semi-erection!

- You and your teeth don't sleep together.

-- You wake up, looking like your driver's license picture.

- It takes two tries to get up from the couch.

- Your idea of a night out is sitting on the patio.

- Happy hour is a nap.

Don't forget; a nooner is a bowl of soup and yet another nap.