Here's a few websites for ya.
As far as your privacy question. You'll never be completely private. But with ham radios, you can use ctscc codes that only allow someone to hear you if they have the same one programmed, and there are many to choose from and you can change them easily. And yes, it is legal to use. It still doesn't keep someone out of your conversation, but its highly unlikely anyone will waste time searching for your ctscc codes.
You might want to re-think your CTSCC code comment, I think you have an error. If you set up a CTSCC transmitter code, you will be transmitting and everyone can hear you on that particular frequency, along with the CTSCC tone in the background. The only exception would be radios that are tuned to that particular frequency AND are set up to only open their squelch for broadcasts with a different CTSCC code in the background.
That radio would ignore any broadcasts on that frequency except ones that the CTSCC code matches. Repeaters are set up this way to keep unwanted signals out of them. One failure of this system is that if a CTSCC transmitter opens the squelch on a CTSCC receiver on that frequency, then any other transmitter on that frequency can be heard on that radio with no CTSCC code as long as the first transmitter keeps the squelch open.
There are several computer programs that can be hooked to some radios that will scan frequency ranges and display activity and any CTSCC code with those transmissions. I have one that scans the entire 2M band about every 2 minutes or so and stores the results. I am using an older Yeasu FT-100D with a laptop connection for that. It is great for Fox hunts with a 13 element beam.