Cliches and expressions your family uses

[sleeperx4]

"He couldn't pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were on the heel."

 

[JB Books]

Gag a maggot off of a meat wagon

 

[sleeperx4]

Not the sharpest tool in the shed.

Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

 

[sleeperx4]

I'll be on you like white on rice.

I'll be on you like stink on s**t.

 

[Shootin 4 Fun]

Get your sh*t together or we'll be having a three-legged race to the ER to get my boot removed from you ass.

 

[Okie4570]

Shaking like like a dog sh-----g log chain

Tighter than Dick's hat band

Ain't worth eight eggs

 

[Lurker66]

Granpa used to say about worthless people he didnt like. "i wouldnt pizz in his azz if his guts were on fire, unless i could pizz gasoline".

 

[JB Books]

Richer than Ben Gumm

Jiminey Christmas!

 

[338Shooter]

Colder than a witches tit in a brass bra doing push-ups in the snow.

 

[OK Quail Hunter]

Neater than a skeeter's peeter

Mites on a chicken's @$$

Happy as a puppy with 2 peckers

A brick short of a load

His/her elevator doesn't go all the way to the top