Restaurant Humor

[Woody's Janitor]

We went at to eat at a local family owned restaurant last night. The matriarch of the family came to our table to tell us about her fiddleback spider bite. She was bitten on the end of her index finger and that area is deconstructing. She said that her doctor just told her that she would most likely lose the finger. Her quick response was: Can you replace it with a finger that vibrates?! She's about 75 plus years old.

A few years ago, she was pissed at two high school boys working for her so she called them in for a meeting. She told them that she could tell they wasn't happy being at work so here's what you two are going to do! She told them to go to the bathroom, pull it out and play with it until they get happy. When you reach the point of happiness, come back to work happy.

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[TinkerTanker]

What a nasty old woman. I didn't know girls get DOMS too. If that had been my kids working for her we'd have them resigning immediately.

 

[Mr.Glock]

Cool old Lady!

 

[turkeyrun]

What a nasty old woman. I didn't know girls get DOMS too. If that had been my kids working for her we'd have them resigning immediately.

IF mine came home complaining, I would tell they had 2 choices;

1. Get happy and go to work.
2. Find a happy place to work or don't be surprised when you get fired.

 

[KroyWen]

Medical treatment for brown recluse venom spider bite is Dapsone, period. Same drug that treats Leprosy, ie, dying flesh. She need not loose her finger.

 

[Bocephus123]

What a nasty old woman. I didn't know girls get DOMS too. If that had been my kids working for her we'd have them resigning immediately.

if you claim you don't play with it you are lying!!

 

[TinkerTanker]

if you claim you don't play with it you are lying!!

People that live in trailer houses, wear wife beaters, and spend too much time in the shower always say "everybody does it". Some of us love God more than we love our peckers.

 

[AKguy1985]

That is funny.

 

[jakeman]

You know what I expect out of an old lady that owns a restaurant that I frequent? Good food & good, friendly service, and an occasional piece of coconut cream pie.

You know what I expect out of an old lady that runs the beer bar on a gravel & dirt road that I frequent? Cold beer, dirty jokes and a ****** attitude.

I don’t expect the other out of either.

Your expectations can differ and we can still be friends, but I might not go to dinner with you.

 

[Snattlerake]

People that live in trailer houses, wear wife beaters, and spend too much time in the shower always say "everybody does it". Some of us love God more than we love our peckers.