How do you go about discouraging someone from getting a gun/permit?
- Thread starter tRidiot
- Start Date
How many on here can honestly say they DO NOT know a person who should not have access to a gun? I now it is a right, no need to remind me. 
I am in about the exact same situation with an older man, he gets confused a lot, not always aware of where he is or what is going on, yet still lives alone.
With his mind as it is he may defend himself when no threat was present at all. Each time he asks about a gun I tell him we will look into it in a few days, he soon forgets for quite a long time.
As to someone breaking in and harming him, I would not feel it is my fault, it would be the fault of the bad guy. This man is 79, he could have decided to get a gun long ago.
He is free to get a gun of his choosing, but like in the OP I am not going to help.
I am in about the exact same situation with an older man, he gets confused a lot, not always aware of where he is or what is going on, yet still lives alone.
With his mind as it is he may defend himself when no threat was present at all. Each time he asks about a gun I tell him we will look into it in a few days, he soon forgets for quite a long time.
As to someone breaking in and harming him, I would not feel it is my fault, it would be the fault of the bad guy. This man is 79, he could have decided to get a gun long ago.
He is free to get a gun of his choosing, but like in the OP I am not going to help.
There's a few distinctions that TO ME, are very important here.
There's more than a few people that I know that I believe shouldn't have firearms. Sorry, they are unsafe people and too emotional IMO. It is well within my right to believe as such. Does this mean I will try to compromise their rights by voting for legislature or reporting them to authorities? NO, not in any way, shape or form. Does me not getting involved with their firearms training compromise their rights? NO. I still don't see how TR's refusal or even discouragement, equals a compromise of someone's rights.
Second, it SOUNDS like this lady isn't frail or can't do things for herself..... rather that she won't. BIG difference. Especially if people are comparing her to someone that has dementia or Alzheimer's.
There's more than a few people that I know that I believe shouldn't have firearms. Sorry, they are unsafe people and too emotional IMO. It is well within my right to believe as such. Does this mean I will try to compromise their rights by voting for legislature or reporting them to authorities? NO, not in any way, shape or form. Does me not getting involved with their firearms training compromise their rights? NO. I still don't see how TR's refusal or even discouragement, equals a compromise of someone's rights.
Second, it SOUNDS like this lady isn't frail or can't do things for herself..... rather that she won't. BIG difference. Especially if people are comparing her to someone that has dementia or Alzheimer's.
That's odd. Because the very first post in this thread clearly states that she is frail and not very physically active. (I will admit that I was grateful to see that someone in their late 60s is not considered elderly. Whoo! Dodged THAT boo-litt!! I'm getting WAY too close to that number to be comfortable with "elderly" being attached to it!)
Yep, you're right. I guess I read it too fast and never looked back. The subsequent diatribe is why I said what I said. Just didn't sound like she had dementia or anything of the like.
She is a bit frail, in terms of weak and would be unable (IMO) to work the slide of a handgun. Nearly ANY semi-auto. Which means it would be up to me or my wife to load and "ready" the firearm for her, and she would never be able to unload it without help, either. A revolver would likely have too heavy a trigger pull for her, and she doesn't want one of those anyways. I didn't explore why, I am assuming she probably thinks that it is old-fashioned or not modern or something. I don't know. I didn't explore the issue.
Her frailty is somewhat... cultivated, if that makes any sense? As in, she almost revels in not being able to do for herself. Like I said, she was kept woman, and she wishes she still was. And nosy as the day is long, let me tell you. lol. But with how many times I've been called over to fix/reset her TV/satellite/internet/surround sound (which I gave her and put in for her), as well as her phone/tablet/laptop, etc., there is no way I'm going to be involved with her purchase of a firearm. It's just not something I want to do.
I'll just ignore it and it probably won't come up again. If it does, I'll explain I don't think it's a good idea for her individually.
On a side note, it's funny... I'm assuming because her husband did everything for her, she thinks every decision in the household is the man's, and the man's only. Many times she has irked my wife when she asks her, "Has Danny decided what you're going to do about xxxx, yet?" When my wife may be "in charge" of that particular subject or issue, and she damn well knows it. She assumes everything has to be my decision, essentially ignoring that my wife is a very highly-educated and strong, independent woman in her own right.
In fact, we both about put the smackdown on her over the weekend, independently and at the same time. It was funny as hail... lol. She always talks about how wonderful the steaks were they always used to have, they lived on a farm in Nebraska. So, she has told us many times (you know how some folks repeat the same stories ad nauseum?) about how she used to eat her steak well done when she married her husband, but he quite literally forced her to eat them rare until she got used to it. And now she likes blue rare, which is fine, I don't care. But we were all at Mother's Day lunch with my mom and her and she got off on some tangent about how men would order for wimmins in the fancy restaurants they used to frequent, because, "That's proper etiquette." Oh. My. GOD. My wife and I looked at each other incredulously and both at the same time came out with, "Oh no it isn't!" We proceeded to let her know there was NO way that would fly in our house, and that it most certainly is NOT the appropriate way to do things. Of course, there are some situations where it is helpful for one partner to do so - if restaurant familiarity is an issue, etc., but we made sure to add the caveat that this is with express permission, not as a presumption. Oh my goodness, we laughed soooooo hard about that interaction later, because we both jumped on that like a chicken on a June bug. lol
Anyways... sorry about the novel. lol
Her frailty is somewhat... cultivated, if that makes any sense? As in, she almost revels in not being able to do for herself. Like I said, she was kept woman, and she wishes she still was. And nosy as the day is long, let me tell you. lol. But with how many times I've been called over to fix/reset her TV/satellite/internet/surround sound (which I gave her and put in for her), as well as her phone/tablet/laptop, etc., there is no way I'm going to be involved with her purchase of a firearm. It's just not something I want to do.
I'll just ignore it and it probably won't come up again. If it does, I'll explain I don't think it's a good idea for her individually.
On a side note, it's funny... I'm assuming because her husband did everything for her, she thinks every decision in the household is the man's, and the man's only. Many times she has irked my wife when she asks her, "Has Danny decided what you're going to do about xxxx, yet?" When my wife may be "in charge" of that particular subject or issue, and she damn well knows it. She assumes everything has to be my decision, essentially ignoring that my wife is a very highly-educated and strong, independent woman in her own right.
In fact, we both about put the smackdown on her over the weekend, independently and at the same time. It was funny as hail... lol. She always talks about how wonderful the steaks were they always used to have, they lived on a farm in Nebraska. So, she has told us many times (you know how some folks repeat the same stories ad nauseum?) about how she used to eat her steak well done when she married her husband, but he quite literally forced her to eat them rare until she got used to it. And now she likes blue rare, which is fine, I don't care. But we were all at Mother's Day lunch with my mom and her and she got off on some tangent about how men would order for wimmins in the fancy restaurants they used to frequent, because, "That's proper etiquette." Oh. My. GOD. My wife and I looked at each other incredulously and both at the same time came out with, "Oh no it isn't!" We proceeded to let her know there was NO way that would fly in our house, and that it most certainly is NOT the appropriate way to do things. Of course, there are some situations where it is helpful for one partner to do so - if restaurant familiarity is an issue, etc., but we made sure to add the caveat that this is with express permission, not as a presumption. Oh my goodness, we laughed soooooo hard about that interaction later, because we both jumped on that like a chicken on a June bug. lol
Anyways... sorry about the novel. lol
I feel ya. I'm STILL grateful I'm not knocking on the door to that "elderly" designation yet! Lol I don't EVER see a day I'm not active. Although if my orthopedic guy has his way my "active" will include a ******* piece of **** walker.
Least he could have done was let me have some crutches ... Not that me and Amazon didn't solve THAT little problem in short order anyway. 
Other side of that coin , what is someone breaks into the house takes her gun you helped her get and kills her with it!!
So many variables in the scenario!! No easy answer here!! tRidiot tell her how you feel about it and why. If she can't handle the answer then that is her problem not yours!!
My mom actually mentioned this herself. She has a couple of my dads guns since he passed, and mentioned needing to shoot them more to get familiar with them since she was worried that if she pulled it out it might just get taken away and used on her.
